Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

Dear John Chase Home Finance,

I apologize for doing this in a letter, but I'm letting you know that we're through. I've found somebody new. I'm sorry.

Perhaps I should have warned you about my prior relationships with lenders. Amsouth, US Bank, even that small student loan, all ended before their time. Let's face it, I'm just not cut out to be a borrower. I never should have led you on. I know I promised you 30 years, but I just can't do it. Really, it wasn't you, it was me. You did everything you promised for the past five years. I thought I could be happy, but it just wasn't enough. You were no longer meeting my needs, so I... I... I'm sorry, but I've been cheating on you.

The "other financial service company" is Vanguard, and they have offered us something you never could. They pay us interest instead of charging it. I know, that's asking a lot, but I finally realized that there really was another way, someone else out there just for us. There just isn't room in our life for both of you.

Don't be sad. I know you've seen this coming, with all those large payments we've been making for so many months now. Stop crying, you'll smudge the ink on this check. Yes, it's the final check. $13, 685.16. It's over. You were a good lender, and I'm sure you'll find other suckers to lend money. It just won't be us.

8 comments:

From the Doghouse said...

OK, I wanna hear more about Vanguard!

Susan said...

We just put the check in overnight mail. I give them nearly $14,000, they give me a carbon piece of paper with a tracking number. Doesn't seem fair, but I'll take it. I will check the tracking 400 times before noon tomorrow.

And Doghouse, Vanguard is one of our favorite mutual fund companies. It's where we keep our money market fund, where I invested my rollover IRA when I left my last job, and where we will start our investing. There are others I like, but they had the best rate and lowest fees on the money market when we opened it.

dhcoop said...

This is great, Susan!!

mayberry said...

I hope you and Greg go somewhere special and celebrate!!

I can't imagine the relief. You should both be congratulated for your hard work and perserverance.

Susan said...

We can't afford it, we just sent all of our money to Chase! Actually we did save back enough for a nice dinner out tonight. And I did buy myself something nice, but that's for another post!

Webmaster said...

FREEDOM!!

Stacey said...

wooohooooooooo! Atta girl! Congratulations!


... Can I borrow some money?

Susan said...

Heh. I'd gladly loan you the 75 cents we have left this month! And for the record, I don't think I've ever been quite so happy about being broke for a few weeks!